Bid- My pain is that I am fat, the husband is ashamed to stay with me. Story of a woman whose husband left her because of obesity

Meerut7 minutes ago

I am Najma.. my age is above 28 years.. My pain is that I am fat and my husband is shy to stay with me. If there is a wound on someone’s body, it can be filled with salve. But my whole body is a cancer to me. I married Salman 8 years ago. Salman was in awe of my beauty and body. Today the situation is such that far from talking to me, he doesn’t even see me.

Najma from Lisadi Gate in Meerut is saddened by her increasing weight. Her husband Salman left her because of her growing weight. The divorce notice has now been sent. Najma is making a rounds at the police station to get justice. She has filed a complaint against her husband at the police station. Along with this, she also told the police officers that she has to live with her husband. She loves him very much. Najma narrated her grief to Dainik Bhaskar…

“Salman’s attitude changed in the second year of marriage”

Ammi Zahida, Najma with Abbu Imamuddin stood in the middle

Najma says the Salman-Meri marriage took place with great fanfare. My father Imamuddin is a bricklayer. I have a brother, Ammi Zahida takes care of the house. Being the only girl, Abbu spent more of his status on my marriage. There was a party of 500 people, all the relatives were called. The dowry that Salman’s mother-abbu asked for was given by my father. The marriage did not fail, he took a loan on the contrary.

For a year after marriage, Salman loved me immensely. A year after I got married, I had a son. After that, Salman’s attitude started to change. He just makes fun of me by calling me fat. Many times he beat me by calling me fat, he left his mother’s house. He was suffering Ammi Abbu also remained silent. This is what has been happening between us for 7 years. This time he dropped me off at my house and sent a divorce notice.

“Obesity is a disease, not a cure”

Najma's mother, Zahida, is losing faith in the police, she is not happy after going to the police stations, they don't listen to her.

Najma’s mother, Zahida, is losing faith in the police, she is not happy after going to the police stations, they don’t listen to her.

Namja says, “I started gaining weight only after having a child. I was also thin at the time of marriage. Obesity is not in my hand, every woman’s weight increases after having a child. I also increase. But after delivery my uterus went I had a problem. The month is over and my weight is increasing. Today I am 95 kg. If Salman had called me fat, I said many times, let’s go to counselling. doctor if there is any disease i will get treatment he is not taking me near my mother in law also did not treat me and i got fat now abbu is working as a laborer to treat me doctor said that if I had been treated 7 years ago, the disease would not have increased. Now many expenses I can’t even have another child because of a defect in the uterus.”

“He doesn’t even like going home now”
Namja says, “My husband Salman, who does computer repair work. There was a time when he used to come home only in the evening. Family members used to interrupt him when he came early. Same, husband he comes home late at night for last 7 years. sometimes 5-5 days pass. salman does not come home. he is missing whole night. even when he comes home he sleeps with his father and mother . He doesn’t even show his face when coming. near me. He doesn’t even like to come to my room and home. He doesn’t even touch the boy.”

Divorce cases have increased due to body shaming. Dr Poonam Sharma, counselor, Family Counseling Centre, Meerut, says that on an average, one in eight cases that come to the counseling center in UP is about the wife’s looks and weight. You can also see these three cases…

Case 1. ‘It’s my fault I’m fat…’
The same thing happened to 20-year-old Shahana in Varanasi on April 3, 2017. After a few days of marriage, Shahana’s husband pronounced talaq three times and sent her to her maternal home. When Shahana asked the reason for leaving the maternal house, the husband only said that you are very fat. I don’t like your fatness. I opened for you

A month after leaving the maternal home, the husband again divorced Shahana over the phone. I married a second time. Shahana told the family that her husband used to tease her everyday by calling her fat. I used to hit Many times he would have taken the plate of food in front of him, and many times he had to stay hungry. Still, he wanted to lead the family. But this obesity came in the middle, I hadn’t thought about it.

This image is from Gulfsha.  It is said that she was tired, so she could not get up early in the morning.

This image is from Gulfsha. It is said that she was tired, so she could not get up early in the morning.

Case 2. Weight gain after marriage, husband says to exercise in the morning
Gulfasha says, “I couldn’t get up and exercise in the morning. I’m fat so they can’t keep up. That was our love. December 28, 2017 Gulfasha from Azimnagar, Rampur filed a complaint against her husband in police station.Husband beats her and gave triple talaq over phone.

When the police asked the reason for the divorce, Gulfsha said I am fat, I wake up late in the morning. So he left me. Gulfasha said that suddenly my weight started increasing after marriage. First, I tell my husband to get me up in the morning and exercise. I wake up late in the morning due to tiredness, so they let me.

Bombay High Court had said: Bibi’s obesity is not a ground for divorce
In 2014, the Bombay High Court dismissed the divorce petition of a husband who wanted to divorce the husband, wife on the grounds of obesity. While rejecting the plea, the Bombay High Court held that weight gain after marriage cannot be a ground for divorce.

The wife had hidden from her husband the matter of having breast surgery before marriage, due to which her weight later increased greatly. The husband had complained that he could not enjoy married life because of his wife’s problem. Justice MS Sonak and A. s. Oka’s Bench observed that the husband’s complaint was only that his wife was overweight and that could not be a ground for divorce.

Now you know why obesity is on the rise in women
According to gynecologist Dra. Sapna Agarwal, obesity is increasing due to hormonal imbalance in women. In women between the ages of 18 and 45, obesity hormones are out of balance. This happens more after marriage. This affects the production of insulin in the body. The lack of balance of the thyroid, the steroid hormones cortisol, progesterone and estrogen, the low production of testosterone increases obesity.

It has increased after Kovid. Because the body’s metabolism was altered. Due to hormonal imbalance, there are diseases like menopause, depression, increased blood sugar in the body, thyroid, joint pain, high blood pressure.

Do this to avoid obesity

  • Women should eat less food than they are hungry.
  • Exercise and yoga should be done.
  • Change lifestyle.
  • Stay healthy by eating a healthy diet.
  • Pay close attention to diet and exercise.

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