Honeymoon abduction cases rise rapidly in Bihar – DW – 23.09.2022

“I have been in a love relationship with him for four years, I married him of my own free will. He didn’t take me, I ran with him myself.” In a video shared on the social media platform, these are the alphabets of a girl whose father has filed an FIR against a boy for kidnapping his daughter.

In Bihar, such incidents have increased rapidly in recent months, with the girl’s family members filing kidnapping FIRs after her disappearance. But when the matter is resolved, it is related to a love story in which the girl herself has run away with her lover. The police are fed up with these cases. These cases have been called honeymoon kidnapping, that is, kidnapping for marriage. The term was coined by the police, who used it to refer to the case of boys and girls who ran away from home to get married.

The scene changes over time, before the boy ran away with the girl, now the girlfriend runs away with the lover. He also openly declares it and asks the police not to take any action against the boy’s relatives in haste. Sociologists are baffled that such cases go viral on social media platforms.

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Girls breaking the shackles of casteism (file photo)Photo: Sajneev Gupta/dpa/picture alliance

“I brought the boy”

Rupanjali from Darbhanga ran away and married a boy from her own village, Rajkumar. Fearing the location, the relatives filed a kidnapping case. But the girl reversed the whole issue by releasing a video. Describing the case as false, she did not want to run away of her own free will, but made the boy run away and get married. He even said that because of my family’s fear, the prince had to leave home. Similarly, Bandhan Kumari from Vaishali eloped last month and married Vishal from a nearby village. Two days later, the relatives filed an FIR against the boy and his relatives at the police station.

On knowing this, Bandhan released a video and made it clear that I have married of my own free will, please don’t disturb us. When Sudha, a young woman from Muzaffarpur, saw caste as an obstacle in her marriage, she ran away and married Vijay from her own village. When the father made the case, he released a video and clarified the reason for the escape.

Shazia from Muzaffarpur eloped and got married a week before the marriage arranged by family members. Posting the video, she urged the police not to harass her in-laws and said that family members were forcibly marrying her off. One such case was seen in Saran (Chhapra) district, where two lovers of different sects got married. After being sued, he released the video and confessed his love and accused the father of forcing him to marry someone else while she wanted to marry of her own free will.

It is another thing for the police to do their job within the scope of the law and look for these loving couples. A girl from West Champaran district, who got married after running away from home in the recent past, says anonymously, “I myself ran away with the boy. I have been in love with him for four years. Despite saying that, the people in the house wouldn’t listen to me. There was talk of getting married somewhere else. There was no choice but to run away from home. And waiting wasn’t even possible. When the police started harassing their innocent relatives, I had to post the video and tell the truth to the police.

Indian society is still very traditional when it comes to marriage
Indian society is still very traditional when it comes to marriagePhoto: Realityimages/Zoonar/picture Alliance

On average, ten girls run every day

According to a police report, in the first six months of this year, 1,870 cases of such people coming forward for marriage came to light in Bihar. If we see daily, an average of these cases are being reported daily ten. So, on average every two and a half hours a loved one runs away from home. So far this year, 2778 cases of honeymoon kidnapping have been registered. According to the National Crime Records Bureau, Bihar ranks number two in this case. While there were 5308 such incidents in 2020, 6589 cases were reported in 2021.

Police officer MP Singh says, “Such cases are very disturbing. Sometimes they become a challenge to law and order. Other states also have to go around, but when the case is solved, the matter it turns out to be something else.

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There is no social recognition for love marriage

Sociologists see it as the result of women’s empowerment. Prof. SC Mahto says, “You can call this situation a kind of social revolution, which is being observed due to the increasing use of technology and increasing literacy rate of women. Though less educated among village-village women, they are using smartphones and internet, what is this? Look back, women were not even able to say the right thing.

Journalist Sudhir K. Singh sees this as a bad effect of the Western style. He believes that due to the proliferation of smartphones and the Internet, the youth have started to know everything by the age of 15-16, because everything good and bad is available on the Internet. They are getting confused about it. That’s why most girls who disappear are between 15 and 20 years old. He says, “Our society still does not recognize love marriage. Fearing the location, the girl’s parents scold, threaten her instead of explaining to her. This worsens the situation and finally she runs away from home and reaches the lover

Psychiatrist Dr. Anamika says, “Due to the hustle and bustle of life, there is a lack of communication between parents and children. Boys and girls are under stress due to physical changes similar to adolescence, they remain more aggressive. After the scolding, all the parents feel bad and little by little they become rebellious.

Excited in such a situation, the stranger who listens to him, expresses his love, begins to like him. His trust is built in them and then due to emotional attachment he starts making decisions based on feelings. He is incapable of feeling right and wrong. Which results in similar incidents.

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